Monday, October 8, 2012

Ms. Independence


Ms. Independence
        In Taiwan, “helicopter parents” are everywhere. Most of the children do not know how to survive on their own. Parents decide everything for their children. Sadly, my father is a helicopter parent too. However, since I came to Chicago to live with my mother, everything has changed. I have to face everything by myself. In this free and independent country, I have gotten lost a sense of comfortable ties to family and friends, but I have gained a new courage and confidence.
        I have never thought that being alone would be the hardest thing in my life. In Taiwan, I lived with my grandparents and relatives, so there was always someone home. Moreover, wherever I went, my father would always call me to make sure I was okay. If I wanted to go shopping, I would always grab a friend to accompany me, or my father wouldn’t let me go alone. As a result, I have never known the feeling of being alone. In the first three months in Chicago, I did not know what to do with myself. I felt lost and fearful. I missed all my dear friends and family.
Besides this, I did not know I had overly relied on my parents when I was in Taiwan. Unlike my father, my mother is a very autonomous person. Also, her work is awfully busy. Therefore, I have had to explore this brand new world by myself. I knew I must be able to do this. After all, I was eighteen years old. However, when we went to buy groceries or to eat in a restaurant, I feared talking to people. My mother was very angry about this. She said “You are eighteen! Act like your age! “I have observed some girls about my age in the United States, and they were very independent various aspects and their lives. Also, parents wouldn’t chase after you every second. Then I realized in the United States, the definition of “the behavior of eighteen years-old girl” is very different from Taiwan.
Most importantly, I never had to earn money for myself. My family is not rich, but we can live comfortably. I never want for anything. In Taiwan, most of the children in my generation their do not have to worry about money. Few people of my age get a job and move away from parents’ house. I do not have to work right now because my mother wants me to focus on studying. However, everyone around me has to work after class. I am very aware that if I do not have a job, I will never live outside my home.

        After a year, I think back on all these frustration moments of being independent in the United States, but I know I am not the same. Although I still miss my father, my relatives, and friends, I’m content to be having a new experience. Also, I miss the days I used to rely my family and friends. However, I am thankful that I have had the chance to overcome. Now I do not feel lost or afraid anymore, and someday, I will be able to be completely independent as an American.

10 comments:

  1. Maggie, you're a wonderful young girl because you've already started to learn how to be courageous, confident and independent although you're only eighteen years old. I hope my daughter grows up just like that way. I like when you said your dad is a helicopter parent. Do you know why they use the word "helicopter" for that kind of parent? I'm just curious :)

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    1. Ohhhh Thank you Sunjoo!! ;)
      helicopter parent is parent who pays extremely close attention to their child's or children's experiences and problems, particularly at educational issues. Just like a helicopter flies over a person.

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  2. Oh, poor Maggie! How blue you were when you came to Chicago. However, being independence is good for you. Even though is hard to you at the beginning to be independence, you are happy to go shopping by yourself now. Aren't you?

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    2. Yes! haha!!
      Shopping alone wasn't too bad, but shopping with you has more fun! ha!

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  3. Hi, Maggie, it's funny because I have a helicopter mother not dad. Here we are in a free country, and we cant do any good things, but we still have to listen to our parents. And about the work don't listen to other people because you mother wants you to get good education and you can do it, so right now don't worry about the job, but your education.

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    1. I believe parents love us so much, so they want us to be good. :)

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  4. I hadn't met any foreign student who were younger than me, and people told me I'm so brave to be alone in another country especially this young. To be honest, I was so proud of myself. And now, I have a friend who's a nineteen-year-old girl! I understand how hard it is because I was super dependent on whoever was around me in Korea. After overcoming many frustrations, I've learned how to be independent. I can see that you are walking the same path with me. You're doing great!! Once we both are able to legally drink, we definitely gotta go somewhere to get drunk and cheer each other up!! :)

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    1. Jess thank you!! I'm glad I have a friend like you too!! ;)
      about the drink...I'm sorry you have to wait two more years haha!
      or we can find other ways, if you know what I mean.((wink wink))

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  5. Ms. Independence will return to you soon, I promise. Sometimes, it is good for you when you can be dependence when you are young. If you and Jess are legal to drink, don't forget me to cheer with you guys, haha!

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